Any Given Soldier

"Hundreds of thousands of holiday cards and letters thanking wounded American troops for their sacrifice and wishing them well never reach their destination. They are returned to sender or thrown away unopened... mail must be addressed to a specific member of the armed forces -- a rule that pains some well-meaning Americans this Christmas season."

Wasn't that always a given? I was under the impression I had to address my mail. Technology these days... wow.

What were you expecting them to do, send your mail literally to any given soldier in some hospital somewhere? Oh yeah, that's great. I can see it now: you're soldier lying in a bed, half dead. You spent the last six months jumping at the sound of footsteps and sleeping on a metal framed cot. You're still recovering from your recently amputated leg, and you have needles sticking out of every extremity. And then the nurse walks in. "Hey, buddy, you have some mail! Want to read it?"

Your girlfriend you haven't seen in months is thinking of you?

Your family just heard the bad news?

Your best friend from your platoon got a free minute to see how your doing?

Ha, joke's on you, sucker!
It's some preppy family from Chicago who wanted you to see how perfect their life was! On the front, there is a loving picture of a three and a six year old in front of a big 19th century colonial with big smiles on their faces! On the inside, it says, "Merry Christmas! Love, Jill, Robby, Thomas, Cindy, and of course Spot!"

"Great, I'm Jewish, but thanks for thinking of me assholes."

Just don't send them.

Read all about it.